Sunday, May 25, 2008

7 Days...

So I had a bit of a melt-down last night. I looked at the enormity of all this, and it really dawned on me what I'd be doing. I finally pictured the details, and it kinda freaked me out. I pictured myself stuck in downtown traffic in Montreal trying to find the parking to the hotel I'll be staying it, and everyone talking in French better than I can. That one thought led to many other details that scared the crap out of me.

I was legitimately freaking out, and eventually decided to flat-out cancel the road-trip. It got to the point that I just didn't want to do it anymore. When I looked at it it didn't look fun anymore, and I forgot what it was supposed to accomplish. But as I was going to sleep that night I remembered. I want to prove to myself once and for all I can do, or at least survive, all the things I always back away from. I need to validate myself, find my own self-worth and all that. And the only way to overcome your fears is to first be afraid.

So I'm still going. In a way I'm glad I had that little freak-out. It really reminded me of why I want this trip so bad. I had started to forget.

But it's one week away. And I'm beginning to realize, when this isn't euphoric and fun, it's gunna be scary as hell.

1 comment:

Georgie said...

dude. you can do this. buy a really good highway atlas (we personally love the rand mcnally huge ones at walmart) and every night plan out your exact route - exit and highway numbers.

if montreal intimidates you, stay on the outskirts. it's easy to get around - there are hotels on 20 and 40 on the west side before you enter the busy traffic, and there are hotels on the main drag in brossard if you jump on 15 and take the southern exit route and go through magog to the monastary.

your fear is really more fear of the unknown - not something to let yourself get an anxiety attack over. it sucks to be going it alone since it's more fun to travel with a friend, but my hub and i have done dozens of long distance road trips and it's sooo much fun.

download some podcasts too - car talk is one that's particularly hilarious and each episode is an hour long. also some inspirational books on cd - borrow them from the library and rip them into mp3.

you can do this! you will LOVE this! montreal is just as easy as winnipeg. just pay attention to the signs and what lane you're traveling in. you'll be fine!